100 Seinfeld quotes

A frenetic mashup of many, many random clips from the legendary sitcom about ‘nothing’.

SEINTOLOGY
Audio compiled by MIX96 (www.themix.com)
Video compiled by danere1
Music: “Time is Tight” by Booker T & The MG’s

FULL LIST OF QUOTES

Jerry: o!

Jerry: So we go into NBC, we tell them we’ve got an idea for a show about nothing.
George: Exactly.
Jerry: They say “What’s your show about?” I say “Nothing”.
George: There you go.
Jerry: I think you may have something here.

Kramer: Who wants to have some fun?
Jerry: Well let’s start the insanity.
Kramer: Giddy-up.

George: Vandelay! Vandelay! Vandelay!
Elaine: Shut up.
George: Vandelay! Vandelay! Vandelay!
Kramer: Wet and wild.
George: Vandelay! Vandelay! Vandelay!
Jerry: Delores!

George: The sea was angry that day my friends…
Jerry: …super-terrific carpal-tunnel syndrome.
Elaine: Stella!
George: I’m sorry, the card says “Moops”.
Elaine: A bird ran into my giant freak-head.
Jerry: I got jiggy with it!
Kramer: I broke the covenant of the keys.
Elaine: I’m speechless! I am without speech.
Kramer: Oh, I got the ball.
Jerry: THAT is one magic loogey.

George: The surprise blindfold greeting. That wasn’t in the manual.
Kramer: A coffee-table book on coffee tables.
Jerry: o, Newman.
Elaine: Is it possible that I’m not as attractive as I think I am?
Kramer: Boy, these pretzels are making me thirsty.
George: I’m gonna need some water here!
Elaine: Maybe the dingo ate your baby.
Kramer: Yo Yo Ma!
Jerry: Little Jerry’s a lean mean pecking machine.
George: I’m speechless. I have no speech.
Kramer: Yo Yo Ma!
Jerry: Not that there’s anything with it!

Kramer: (to Newman) Oh, I’m looking right at you big daddy.
Jerry: She had man hands.
Kramer: You’re an anti-dentite.
Jerry: You’re a massage teaser.
Jerry: So he’s bizarro Jerry.
Jerry: That is one tough monkey.

Elaine: He’s a re-gifter!
Jerry: He’s a real bounder…
Elaine: He’s a real… sidler!
Jerry: He’s a mimbo.
Jerry: She’s one of these low talkers…
Jerry: A long talker.
Elaine: A high talker.
Jerry: A close talker.
Kramer: Yeah, yeah I am batman.
Jerry: Well, now we’re getting somewhere!

GEORGE
Elaine: He’s short, he’s stocky…
George: …I am Costanza, Lord of the Idiots.

ELAINE
Jerry: She enjoys teasing animals, banlon, and seeing people running for their lives.
Elaine: (to Crazy Joe DaVola) I’m a *day* person.

JERRY
George: …a horse face, big teeth and a pointy nose.
Jerry: …a man who respects a good coma.

KRAMER
Elaine: …a tall lanky doofus…with hair like the bride of Frankenstein.
Kramer: I’m Cosmo Kramer!

Jerry: But are you still ‘Master of your domain’?
Kramer: Yo Yo Ma!
George: I am ‘King of the county’.
Elaine: I’m ‘Queen of the castle’.
Jerry: ‘Lord of the manor’.
Kramer: Yo Yo Ma!
George: I hate The Drake.
Elaine: I love The Drake!
Kramer: I’m out!

Elaine: The big salad
Kramer: The Bro
Jerry: Junior Mint
Elaine: Urban sombrero
Kramer: Fusilli Jerry!
Jerry: Rochelle Rochelle
George: Significant shrinkage!
Elaine: Fake, fake, fake, fake.
Jerry: Golden boy
Elaine: Chocolate babka
George: Bosco
Elaine: Sponge-worthy
George: Buffer-zone
Elaine: This, that and the other.
Kramer: Happy Festivus!
Elaine: Maestro
George: Tippy-toe! Tippy-toe!
Elaine: Yada yada yada…
Jerry: I think I may have made a big mistake.
George: Comfort-shmomfort
Jerry: Friendship-smienship
Timmy: You double dipped the chip!
Elaine: I keep thinking that goiter is gonna start talking to me.
Kramer: I’m dangerous, Jerry… I’m very, very dangerous!
Jerry: That guy’s gonna put the kibosh on me!
Elaine: Jerry, how can I go on!?
Soup Nazi: No soup for you!

George: But I’m disturbed, I’m depressed, I’m inadequate… I got it all!
Jerry: But I don’t want to be a pirate!
Babu: You bad man, you very bad man!
Jerry: I’ve swept myself off my feet!
George: I have no hand!
Jerry: Sweet fancy Moses.
Kramer: Well, people kept ringing the bell!
Jerry: Well, let’s cut the bull, sister.
Jerry: The wheels are in motion.
George: Everytime I think I’m out, they pull me back in.
Elaine: It’s “Suzie”, it’s not “Suze”.
Kramer: You stubborn, stupid, silly man.
Jerry: Who leaves a country packed with ponies to come to a non-pony country?
Kramer: I’m not a pimp!
Jerry: I don’t wanna be Switzerland.
Elaine: Go work on your pecs and your lats… we’re all really impressed.
George: It’s Thunderdome!
Kramer: You’re freaking me out!
Jerry: I’m freaking out. I am freaking out!
George: Serenity now!

Helen: Oh you have to go, you have to.
Jerry: I’m going.
Hellen You have to!
Jerry: O-kay.

Jerry: Buh-bye.

Duration : 0:3:36


[youtube mKsUlf20DF0]

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25 Responses to “100 Seinfeld quotes”

  1. jprince815 Says:

    I SWEPT MYSELF OFF …
    I SWEPT MYSELF OFF MY FEET

  2. jaystech Says:

    GREAT! i love …
    GREAT! i love seinfeld!!!

  3. HotLipsxLeia Says:

    AMAZING!!
    (:

    AMAZING!!
    (:

  4. madfighter108 Says:

    Where is ” My …
    Where is ” My wallet is missing ” episode 5 season 4 ?

  5. Beatleluver1234567 Says:

    “Well lets start …
    “Well lets start the insanity.” “Lets do it!”

  6. apopkakellys Says:

    This was actually …
    This was actually an audio first, I’ve had the mp3 for years. This video was put together to go with the music, which is very impressive if you think about it. :)

  7. TheSkadoosh1 Says:

    I am a DAAAYYY …
    I am a DAAAYYY person

  8. Snowboard022 Says:

    but i dont want to …
    but i dont want to be a pirate haha

  9. xStewartGilliganx Says:

    why the fiuck do …
    why the fiuck do you have to edit it like and put music over it it ruines the whole thing?!?!?!

  10. sweetcherrypie88 Says:

    this is by far one …
    this is by far one of the most hilarious and well made quotes video I’ve ever seen… it’s been in my favorites for a long time now and I can’t stop watchin it

  11. GunterJPN Says:

    there used to be an …
    there used to be an awesome Seinfeld montage on here to the Superman theme. if someone can point me to it, I’d appreciate it

  12. ThreeEyedGod Says:

    we need, ” ….. …
    we need, ” …..wanna get some pizza?”

  13. BdAdtkSS13 Says:

    this is sick.
    this is sick.

  14. codyizduhman94 Says:

    Ya gotta love …
    Ya gotta love Seinfeld

  15. anaconda536 Says:

    “HELLOOOO” LOL i …
    “HELLOOOO” LOL i love that episode.

  16. havoc1310 Says:

    Where’s the part …
    Where’s the part where Kramer is going “Mama…oh maaama.”When passing his kidney stones. The Gymnast

  17. BigDrive88 Says:

    Does anyone know …
    Does anyone know the name of the song in the background

  18. FernandoDANTE Says:

    Epic. You win at …
    Epic. You win at YouTube.

  19. theonlybyrone Says:

    Absolutely …
    Absolutely brilliant. Great rhythm,pacing and timing. Not to mention you actually used clips of increasing emotional energy to sync with the swell of energy in the music. Well done, sir. Well done indeed. You should be a professional editor.

  20. lizzylizardson Says:

    these pretzels are …
    these pretzels are making me thirsty….=))=))=))

  21. meowmeowrowr323 Says:

    You are a genius. …
    You are a genius. Few people can put together a montage that so properly displays all of the hilarity and ingenuity that is Seinfeld.

  22. eldanba Says:

    I just loved it… …
    I just loved it… the only thing is that the background music is too loud and simetimes u cannot hear the seinfeld dialogue… If you can upload to me a version without the music i would be dirlled…
    This video rocks!

  23. lordworcestershire Says:

    You soup nazi!!!
    You soup nazi!!!

  24. SKATExRISE Says:

    buffer zone!
    buffer zone!

  25. dilemma321 Says:

    NO SOUP FOR YOU!!! …
    NO SOUP FOR YOU!!! XD

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